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Showing posts from March, 2012

The London Olympic Games 2012: Britain Needs YOU!

I was 11 years old when I won my first trophy.  As far as I was concerned, being crowned winner of a primary school sports day was the pinnacle of sporting achievement.  It was confirmed: I was the most naturally talented athlete the world had ever seen.  ‘Great.’ I thought.  ‘When can I retire?’  This belief was not to last.  When the summer made way for the big boys of senior school, I felt my world ranking take a nosedive.  Disillusioned by so much competition, I withdrew from the challenge of making my fantasy a reality.  As a result, my first sports trophy, sadly, became my last.
Suffice to say, this is not the mentality adopted by our Olympians. They saw the challenge early on, acknowledged and accepted the sacrifice, and undaunted, made the journey anyway - onwards, upwards - from a school gym class to the lofty heights of world class.
To watch the London Olympic Games is to see a brief, momentous - and sometimes final - chapter in an athlete’s long and incredible journey, where s…

Give me a "D!", give me a "FRAG!"

If my parents' computer were a car, someone would have written 'I wish my wife was this dirty' on the rear windscreen.

Pride & Projectionist

It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a cinema-loving man or woman in possession of a good projector, must be in want of an appreciative audience and a respectable picture house in which to put them. According to general consensus, its auditorium must be dark, comfortable with room to securely place a cup or glass, a small to medium-sized snack, and a few sundry items for comfort and convenience. Furthermore, leg room must be ample and the main feature prompt to ensure the screening experience is not besmirched by factors that may have otherwise been avoided. It is then the job of the projectionist to provide a seamless presentation in sound and vision that runs alongside the ideals of the film makers' artistic intent. If all these expectations are managed and followed to the letter, and the film itself appeals to the taste of the cinemagoer, and so long as no outside factors have cause to spoil or interrupt proceedings, then an intensely satisfying evening will be had by…

My Weekend In Numbers

The speed in miles per hour that my cousin refused to exceed while driving in Birmingham.

The place my other cousin came in the Inter Counties Cross Country Championships. 

The approximate average pace in minutes per mile that he achieved.

The place my cousin expects to come in the same race in two years’ time.

The place I expect my cousin to come in the same race in two years’ time.

The amount in Pound Sterling a plastic toy I was selling made on eBay.

The amount in Pound Sterling this plastic toy had cost me.

This toy’s weight in grams.

The approximate distance in miles this toy will have to travel to get to its new owner.

The number of pictures taken while visiting my brother in Birmingham.

The number of people who subsequently used one of these photos as a Facebook profile picture.
The approximate number of seconds my brother had to hold the following position while I fumbled with the settings on my camera.

The number of trains taken.

The rating, …